


Control Yourself, Take Only What You Need From It

by frostbite



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Cocaine, Drug Use, M/M, Oral Sex, Sad, Smut, idk this kind of sucks but it felt good
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-17
Updated: 2014-01-17
Packaged: 2018-01-09 02:12:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1140218
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/frostbite/pseuds/frostbite
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Niall cant do anything but stay silent and watch.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Control Yourself, Take Only What You Need From It

**Author's Note:**

> On tumblr at Narryfrost

Niall stands against the wall, his head pounds and he crosses his arms over his chest as dishes crash to the floor, and chairs tip over.

"I fucking hate you," Harry screams, sobs as he throws more things onto the ground, "I fucking hate you," he repeats, over and over and _over_ again. The words echo through Niall's mind, and he can't do nothing but watch Harry break, shatter into a million pieces. And all he can do is watch. 

"You promised me, you fucking _promised,"_ he sobs harder, tears stream down his cheeks, and he drops to his knees, broken glass surrounds him, some pieces threaten to puncture his skin but he doesn't care, he cant. He can't even breathe, and he's surprised he hasn't passed out yet, really. Niall's legs shake, and his arms tremble as he bites his nails, until he can do nothing but bite his skin, and watch. He watches as Harry cries into his hands, wiping his eyes every so often, he watches Harry go silent, and stand up grabbing a broom and begin to sweep up his mess. And he watches him shut the lights off and make his way into their room, and he wonders if its even _their_ room anymore. 

Inside the room, Harry sits on his side of the bed, and his body aches. He shivers a bit, his eyes red and sore from crying and rubbing them. Niall stands in the door way, arms still crossed and Harry wants to scream at him, and tell him to get the fuck out and never come back, and tell him how much he hates him, and how he never wants to see him again, but he doesn't. And his body shakes a bit, and he stares at the ground, and swallows past the lump in his throat. "Was it worth it?" 

And Niall continues to stay silent, and he thinks about it, and he really, _really_ thinks about it. 

"Yeah," he whispers, surprised to hear how calm his voice is. But Harry's stomach has turned inside out, and he just begins crying again, harder than before (if that was even possible). "It was worth it? Really? How could you say that? You've been so good for three months, Christ Niall. Are you fucking stupid?" He shrieks, and Niall knows the neighbors can hear them, and hopes they don't call the police this time. "Why did you do it? Why? You promised you wouldn't, fucking hell. Why did I believe you? Why did I ever, _ever fucking believe you?"_

"I'm sorry," Niall offers, but its like he hasn't said it because Harry just stands up and paces, back and forth one hand covering his mouth and the other pushing against his stomach as if he was going to be sick. "What am I supposed to do now, Niall?" He asks, his voice quivering a bit towards the end, and thats when Niall finally felt his heart drop into the pit of his stomach. "You spent all the money on fucking coke! What am I supposed to do? You were supposed to be paying the rent! I gave up everything for _you_ , I have no home to go back too!" He sobbed, Niall's sighed, reaching up and raking his fingers through his blond hair. "What am I supposed to fucking do?" 

And it was like the ball dropped, and the sound of a million dishes crashing against the ground filled the silence that Harry left them in. He closed his eyes, and his life began to come back to him in pictures, his whole world spun, faster and faster until he had to sit down, leaning his head against the wall. The silence rang in his ears as he pounded his fist against the wall, fighting back the tears that threaten to spill over the brims of his eyes. He can't cry, he doesn't deserve too. He wants to feel bad for himself, wants to scream that its an addiction, he can't fucking _help it,_ but he just stays silent, because thats what he's best at. 

His mind spins faster, waves of emotion flood through him, causing his chest to tighten as he grips the door and tries to stand up. Memories flash in front of him, and it takes him back, repeating all over like a skipping track, just like a CD when it gets scratched, spinning but never moving forward. 

_"C'mon man just try it, you'll be fine."_   
_"Two lines won't hurt, yeah? You'll feel good as new."_   
_"C'mon Niall, its just a bit of coke, yeah? You feel good yeah? Have another line."_

And just like that, everything crashes into nothing, and behind his eyelids are just black and the sound of Harry sniffling and pacing back and forth fills his ears. 

"I don't fucking know what to do," he whispers, and its the saddest sound he's ever heard because he _knows_ Harry's broken inside, and he can't do anything but watch. "I don't have enough money for another apartment, I can't live on the streets, i'm too fucking far away to stay with Louis, god, why does this have to fucking happen." He sighs, covering his face with his hands, and thats all he can do anymore is cry. Niall's eyes open, and Harry's standing just inches away from him, and he does the only thing he thinks could work, well not work, because he knows he's fucked. He scrambles to his feet, waves of exhaustion and sadness fill him up as he reaches in for Harry, wrapping his arms around the younger boy. 

Harry fights back, pushes him away the best he can but Niall doesn't let go, just shouts at him to stop shoving him away. But Harry can't let his guard down, so he pushes harder and yells at him to stop and get the fuck away from him while tears fall from his eyes and cascade down his cheeks and soak into his shirt that hangs loose against his body. Eventually he gives up, and their bodies press together and Harry's knees give out but Niall holds him up the best he can as he cries. "I hate you, I fucking hate you so much." And just like that they sink to the floor, and Niall holds him to his chest, and closes his eyes rubbing his hands up and down his back. "It'll be okay, I promise." 

"I can't believe you, I fucking did everything for you and you do this," and Niall stays silent and rakes his fingers through his curls. "I hate you, I hate you, I hate you." So Niall does the only thing left to do, and he kisses him, his eyes close to black and it takes a few seconds but Harry's lip begin moving against him, and they're kissing, with hands racing up and down each others bodies like they hadn't seen each other in years, and they undressed and explored each other like the first time, taking things slowly. 

Niall pushes the younger boy down against the bed, back first so the sad boy stares up at him with low eyes and a pout. Niall leans up and presses a kiss on his cheek, and down his neck and jawline. He continues down his chest, and around his navel, pressing his lips against each hip bone before making his way down to where his boxers rested against his skin. Harry left out a soft moan, muffled by the back of his hand as the younger boy took his boxers and slipped them down to his knees allowing his cock to fall against his stomach. Niall traced the prominent veins with his thin fingers, before wrapping his palm around the base and kitten licking the tip feeling his dick twitch in his hand. Another moan left Harry's mouth as he watched down at the older boy, wrapping his pink lips around the head and swiping his tongue along the slit tasting the saltiness of the precum that seeped onto his tongue. Niall went slow, bobbing his head up and down along the length of Harry's hard, throbbing cock. He hollowed his cheeks, humming around it before pulling all the way up sucking against the tip again, sending Harry into ecstasy. 

"Jesus fuck, Niall," Harry whimpered, biting into his knuckle, his chest flushed a deep red as the blond continued on, sucking against the tip, flicking his tongue over the slit again, pumping along the base. "I need you, shit, really need your cock inside me," he cried, his voice trembling. Niall pulled back, leaning over to the dresser and took the almost empty bottle of lube from the drawer. He squeezed some of the gel onto his fingers, going straight past his cock towards his hole. Niall teased Harry's tight hole before pressing his finger inside slowly, feeling his walls clenching around him as he scissored his fingers in and out, gingerly adding a second, stretching him open. By his third finger, Harry moaned loud, rocking back and forth against his fingers, crying out, _pleading_ for more. 

Niall pulled his fingers back, wiping them on Harry's discarded boxers that laid beside them. He removed his own boxers, kicking them away before applying lube to his own dick, Harry spread his legs apart, propping his legs up and a pillow under his bum. Niall looked at the broken boy, biting his lip as Harry nodded his head, his eyes still red from crying. Niall closed his eyes as he lined up his cock with Harry's tight hole, Harry whimpered as Niall slid his length in, gripping his hips as he thrusted slightly into his sensitive walls. Harry's eyes closed tight as he fought back the tears that threatned to spill from his eyes. His mind spun in circles as Niall fucked him, pushing himself harder and harder until he was crying out, his voice echoing through the room. _Moremoremoremore._

Niall held his breath as he pushed harder, his thumbs pressing into Harry's skin, hard enough to leave bruises. Harry wrapped his arms around the older boy's neck, holding him close as he fucked him harder, using his free hand to snake between the two and begin thumbing the tip of Harry's cock. He pushed his face into the crook of the green-eyed boy's neck, biting against the flesh before leaving dark love bites, down to his collarbones. Harry cried out Niall's name, beginning for him to go faster, to hold him tighter, _keep going, fuck, please keep going I'm gonna cum, Ni. Oh my god._

Niall pushed harder, breathing hard against his neck, pressing his thumb harder against his hip as the burning feeling moved up from the backs of his thighs, burning up into his stomach. Pressure filled inside of his stomach, "m'close babe, m'so close. I love you so fucking much, oh my god." He cries as his cock twitches inside of him, and not long after he's cuming inside the younger boy, and Harry followed not long after, Harry came over Niall's hand, ribbons of cum spurting over his hand and along his stomach. Niall pulled out, laying beside Harry as they both took shallow breathes. "Jesus Christ," Harry finally let out, his heart still beating against his chest, fast enough he was sure it'd burst.

Niall laid silent, his entire mind still black as color swirled behind his eyelids, and the air became cooler, lowering his body tempature. Harry rolled onto his side, biting his nails as reality set in, and they were still broken. 

Niall grabbed his hand, lacing their fingers together. "I'm so sorry," he whispered, "I never meant to fuck up so bad, I promise i'll get help, i'll talk to the landlord, I just, i'll fix this alright?"

Harry swallowed hard, "m'not sure I should trust you," he whispered. 

Niall nodded his head, "and you don't have too, just please don't stop loving me." Harry looked into his eyes, pressing his lips together and took a deep breath.

_"I never could."_

**Author's Note:**

> Loveeeee you guys


End file.
